The Hardcore Truths About Marriage

The Hardcore Truths About Marriage

Hey ladies and gentlemen,

I was fortunate enough to have one of those text messages forwarded to me by a very good friend of mine. When I got the text through I thought to myself this is one of those message that randomly get circulated around Whatsapp, and at first I was a little apprehensive to read it, then I thought, what could it hurt for me to read just one more of these predictable messages.

Boy was I wrong, this message for me was one of the most important messages I believe I could have read, and just at a time when I really needed reminding of this crucial message. The message was entitled Hardcore truths About Marriage by Bishop David Oyedepo. Sometimes we think we know what produces a great marriage, but do we really. Did you ever think that, teamwork, the display of affection you allow your children to see, and spending time to nourish your respective other all have a great impact for a marriage to strive, work out and last? Well I won’t talk too much just read this message below by Bishop David Oyedepo and tell me you’re not inspired and glad to read this word of wisdom.


1. There is nothing that threatens the security of a man than the thought of another man competing for the attention and affection of his wife. Nothing is more painful. Nothing is more disrespecting. Nothing is more insulting. Nothing is more belittling and degrading.

2. Marriage flourishes when the couple work together as a team; when both husband and wife decide that winning together is more important than keeping score.

Good marriages don’t just happen. They are a product of hard work.

3. Your children are watching you and forming lasting opinions on love, commitment, and marriage based on what they see in you. Give them hope. Make them look forward to marriage.

4. Husbands: The reason why other women look attractive is because someone is taking good care of them. Grass is always green where it is watered. Instead of drooling over the green grass on the other side of the fence, work on yours and water it regularly. Any man can admire a beautiful woman, but it takes a true gentleman to make a woman admirable and beautiful.

5. When a husband puts his wife first above everyone and everything except God, it gives his wife the sense of security and honor that every wife hungers for.

6. A successful marriage doesn’t require a big house, a perfect spouse, a million dollars or an expensive car. You can have all the above and still have a miserable marriage. A successful marriage requires honesty, undying commitment and selfless love and Jesus at the centre of it all.

7. Pray for your spouse every day; in the morning, in the afternoon and at evening. Don’t wait until there is a problem. Don’t wait until there is an affair. Don’t wait until something bad happens. Don’t wait until your spouse is tempted. Shield your spouse with prayer and cover your marriage with the fence of prayer.

8. The people you surround yourself with have a lot of influence on your marriage. Friends can build or break your marriage; choose them wisely.

9. One spouse cannot build a marriage alone when the other spouse is committed to destroying it. Marriage works when both husband and wife work together as a team to build their marriage.

10. Don’t take your spouse for granted. Don’t take advantage of your spouse’s meekness and goodness. Don’t mistake your spouse’s loyalty for desperation. Don’t misuse or abuse your spouse’s trust. You may end up regretting after losing someone that meant so much to you.

11. Beware of marital advice from single people. Regardless of how sincere their advice may be, most of it is theoretical and not derived from real life experiences. If you really need Godly advice, seek it from God-fearing, impartial and prayerful mature couples whose resolve has been tested by time and shaped by trials.

12. Dear wife, Don’t underestimate the power of the tongue on your marriage. The tongue has the power to crush your marriage or build it up. Don’t let the Devil use your tongue to kill your spouse’s image, self-confidence and aspirations. Let God use your tongue to build up your marriage and bless and praise your spouse.

I know your now thinking wow, that was a powerful message. Isn’t it funny how in one way or another we have probably heard about all these things but we haven’t really taken notice of the advice, or even implemented them in our marriage. Well I really do hope your now feeling enlightened, and blessed by this message. Most importantly remember it for when your experiencing those days when you feel like giving up on your marriage, refer back to this message and use it to encourage and strengthen you.

xo Asiabee

  • I completely agree that good relationships are the product of hard work, it takes honesty, courage, and compromise on both sides to make things stick! I also agree that it’s so important not to take your other half for granted – never stop reminding them why you love them! Such a great post, thank you for sharing!

    Abbey 💓

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      So true! Thank you for sharing!

  • These are so true, especially the one about grass looking more green when it’s watered! It takes so much hard work to keep a relationship together x

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      yep! If we invest in what we have we won’t look at what others have x

  • Gemma

    I agree with all of this! I think there’s a lot that you need to focus on to keep a relationship strong. It needs to work on both sides aswell! This is such a lovely post, thank-you for sharing. I think this will be something I will always remember!

    Gemma |

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      Thank you for reading! it does take a lot of work to make a relationship work

      • Gemma

        You’re welcome! Yees it does but it is soo worth it!

  • Maria H Trejo

    In all honesty, I tend to stray away from serious relationships. I had a great guy and I let him go because I wasn’t ready to be with him. This tips really help me remember that love is worth it, and it may be tough but if I love someone I have to work on it. Thank you so much

    lupe ||

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      That’s great! I’m glad this post helped! Relationships are hard but we have to find the ones worth fighting for xx

  • Serena Reidy

    Interesting post 🙂 marriage does seem like a lot of hard work

  • Chloe Thomas

    I’m not married but I really liked reading this! Relationships take a lot of work to maintain and function, as well as it being a two-way street!

    – Chloe

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      Yes tell me about it!

  • Lovely post, I’m not Marloes yet but this was a very interesting read for sure.

    Jordanne ||

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      Thank you!

  • I am not sure I agree with the first one and the last one. I don’t think that disrespecting that another man may find a man’s wife attractive. You can’t control who you’re going to fall in love with and the wife is not object that someone can win. If the husband trusts his wife, then even though other man may be attracted by her, nothing bad is gonna happen. It’s all about trust. With regard to the devil’s tongue, this applies to both men and women. Men can also be pretty offensive when they talk. I do strongly agree that marriage or any relationship is a lot of work! xx Corinne from Corinne & Kirsty

    • Hetty Ashiagbor

      Thank you for sharing your perspective – We really appreciate that! It’s true that we can be married or have a partner and find other people attractive and vice versa but as long as we don’t act upon it then we’re all good x

  • This is amazing, and I really appreciate the advice. I am getting married in March. I am so thankful and blessed to have a wonderful man like my fiance. And today is his birthday too!


  • Alys George

    I loved how honest and truthful you were in this, it really is so important that others know that marriage can be hard at times, but also so rewarding.
    I’m not married myself, but I hope that knowing all of this for future reference it will help me in ensuring I do it all right.